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“I thought I could describe a state; make a map of sorrow. Sorrow, however, turns out to be not a state but a process.”

~ C.S. Lewis, Irish author and poet~

“The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal ...

In my practice, I talk often with clients on the topic of dating - especially online dating. I’ve had the pleasure to see so many new relationships bud and people fall madly in love. I have also seen dating go all wrong. Needless to say, we never know when our person will show up, but how we put our...

We have come to be danced
not the pretty dance
not the pretty pretty, pick me, pick me dance
but the claw our way back into the belly
of the sacred, sensual animal dance
the unhinged, unplugged, cat is out of its box dance
the holding the precious moment in the palms
of our hands and feet dance

We have co...

Step 4

'Sweet Spot'

Step 4 is learning where your “sweet spot” is on your arousal curve. When you first start working on ejaculation control, your sweet spot is going to be much lower than after you’ve gained more confidence.

Meaning when you first start to practice, your sweet spot might be betw...

An Introduction to Sex as Meditation: How to turn the erotic into a mindfulness practice.

One of the core beliefs of 'Sex As Meditation' is that erotic energy and sexuality are lenses that we can use to deepen into the experience of being human. This connection can help us feel more present and fre...

Have you been curious about what the most common questions of men who struggle to control their ejaculation are? so do many people. below is a compilation of the most common questions I get.

- How long do men typically sustain erections (what is a realistic baseline)?

Most erections come and go. M...

Step 5

The fifth and final step (which is often already happening if you’re practicing the four steps before) is to let the energy that builds in your cock move through the rest of the body.

Imagine the energy moving

When you are masturbating or with your partner, imagine the intense pleasure in ...

Getting stuck chasing the your orgasm is something many of us are familiar with. It seems so normal that it’s become habitual – sex doesn’t “count” unless there’s an orgasm. Both people have to reach climax, right?

With all their splendor and glory, orgasms over focus can create a few negative side...

What if I told you that you’re missing out on life? You are missing out on opportunities to meet “the one,” or ones. You've already missed out on cool, interesting conversations with people and possibly life-changing experiences. You might wonder why – how could this happen? “…..I subscribe to every...

Step 3

The next step is learning your curves. The two curves you'll need to better understand for ejaculation control is the arousal curve and anxiety curve. I refer to both scales 1 through 10, 1 being low and 10 being the high.

The arousal curve is how aroused you feel and how hard your cock is,...

Step 2

This next step is learning 'anal breath.' Most people look at me like I am literally crazy when I start talking about how your asshole and how tight you are clenching is one of the most important tool in learning to control your ejaculation.

Anal Breath and Orgasm

For men and women alike, ...

What is the strategy you can actually apply in order to control your ejaculation?

First, before you start any sexual experience, whether it’s masturbating or with a partner, you want to make sure you use the bathroom. Like earlier when you learned about the fight or flight response, if your body ha...